User:Average/Snide Guide to Starting a Business
Snide Guide to Starting a Business
Unless you're going to go wild, everyone needs to make some money to earn their keep. So, you have an idea for something that the market isn't providing. That's great! That's how the market is supposed to work: supply and demand. Of course, you're not going to over-diversify, because that would dilute your brand and increase the complexity of your business to you and your customers.
We're going to start a business[edit]
You have an idea, a space picked out, start-up capital, and are ready to hire employees. But there's a lot more to keeping a business. You'll soon be overrun with concerns you haven't prepared for, delays in supply, or lack of interest.
But don't think that just starting a business is being part of the revolution. It takes more than meeting supply and demand in an economy of spoiled addicts. Any fool can make GDP in a diseased system because it's always in some kind of low-level panic. (Wanna be a doctor?) Don't exploit it.
Enemies[edit]
There are enemies on the path. They aren't other competitors, or banks, or your sister-in-law who thinks she knows better. No, they are tendencies within yourself.
Enemy #1: HowGreatThouArt. You've dominated the market, you have an expensive mansion. "You've MADE it!" Woo woo. That's why they call it the "filthy lucre". This false peak will deteriorate your goals and employees faster than about any other.
Hidden blow: You become a king (or queen) in a castle in which no one can visit or no one wants to visit except for people you loathe. Guided meditation.
Enemy #2: NoClearPurpose. You wanted to open a restaurant because you know what good food tastes like, but pretty soon you get swamped with customer demands and finances that you cut corners and forget why you started.
Hidden blow: You become the Champion on Team Mediocrity and suddenly your market has been taken over. How much did you really master of what you sell? Did you know how to make/service every part of it? The depression of being irrelevance to the global game hit you. You had your business focused meeting revenue over expenses, documented all of your procedures, and everything was running smoothly, except one thing: no one cared. Your customers turned into marks at a carnival and you played them.
What happens when you get defeated by #1: You become another hated capitalist amidst all of your paper success. You have all the money, but none of the happiness. #2: You become a slum employer whom people only work for because they have bills to pay or your back out on the street with no revenue.
Allies[edit]
The allies are crucibles: conflicting goals that you have to revolve for yourself. There's no book that can guide you how to resolve it because this is what will test you as a business.
TheChooser: Cheap and Dirty vs. Sustainable and Quality
TheOptimizer: Investing in the floor vs. Just getting it done
HumanRelationshipments: Customer is always right vs. Employees Need Support
Product: Quantity vs. Being the Best
Notice that marketing isn't mentioned? Beyond informing people that you exist, good products and services should market themselves. No one likes the clarion call always resounding from every corner of the township. If you see lots of marketing, it's because something's wrong with the product.
Setting it up[edit]
The basics: Business Acumen, Logistics, People Management, Product Quality. These are probably the main things you need to concern yourself with.
Check with your local city hall about what you need to start your business. The local development office may also have resources to help you, but may also misguide you, so stay aware and evaluate. Remember that unless you're just scratching some personal itch, that other people are just like you and there're lots of them.
Crafting your core DNA will help you hone your mission and focus. It's called a Statement of Purpose or Notice of Incorporation. If you don't have this, your energies will be pulled every which way and your primary contribution will get diluted.
Don't let legal issues interrupt your ability to contribute: if you've set up your above Statment, if you're doing basic diligence (safety and taxes), the law isn't supposed to penalize people for trying. This is true despite what your local city official told you. Remember those three branches of government thing? If you're being roadblocked because of the Executive Branch (police, city hall, etc), let them charge you with "X" and then go to court and argue how they were impeding your freedom without contributing anything to the public. The law is often too general. Each situation is unique.
Conclusion[edit]
If you've conquered the first enemy, you've put your business first instead of yourself and are a respected member of the economic community.
If you've conquered the second enemy, you've made your business a source of excellence and lead by example. Everyone loves you.
Now, when you're ready for the final challenge, move on to self-actualization. Good luck!
Author[edit]
The author was once a manager for a university department who failed at it so bad that he left it to study AI. He then meditated on the issue from on top of the All-Seeing-Eye until he became enlightened. Now criticizes the Fortune 100 until they call him to negotiate a truce. \0xDynamite (talk) 15:38, 1 July 2017 (UTC)
